I Don't Know What To Call This

It's been nearly month since my last post and I wan't to say that I've been completely productive with my days and that my words are just filling up pages in my notebook, but I can't say that. I actually did go and have a writing day with my friend before this month started and I had this idea all planned out to the point where I could start writing and it made sense, but I couldn't go through with it. It was all about vampires and in my opinion it was just what I needed. the perfect blend of violence, and freedom, and fighting for what was right. I couldn't even start it. So far the past months, I've been doing nothing but going to work and coming home to sleep. There were two or three days where I actually got to hang out with friends that wasn't at work and that was amazing.

I'm still in the process of reading The Bloodlines series by Richelle Mead and it's still good. I just bought the third book and now there's two guys on the cover as well as the girl. I'm really hoping that it doesn't turn into some love triangle. I can't express how much I hate love triangles, which was the main reason why I stopped reading young adult books in the first place because it seems that's all there was with every book I would pick up. I was completely hesitant on stating this genre again, but I remembered how much I loved The Vampire Academy series a couple years ago, so hopefully it isn't too bad. Right not it's the only series I'm reading and I have no idea what I'm going to red next. I don't know if I'm going to start the Harry Potter series again or just try to find something else entirely.

The other day me and my friend were hanging out at Books A Million and I found myself in the new age area looking at all the books they had about magic, spells, and tarots. (I don't know why they call it new age, when it's been around longer than Christianity) But anyway, I've always wanted to learn more about this stuff. I've always found it fascinating and would always check out books about Wicca and Pagan stuff at the library whenever I wanted to write a story about witches. I fell in love with this kind of stuff and how they were connected to the basic elements and so on. While I was standing there, I was just itching to purchase all these books and start my research. I didn't get them but its been on my mind and I haven't been able to think about anything else or the fact that I really do want to write something about spell castors. Whether they are going to witches or not, is still undecided in my head.

I've been thinking about it for a long time now too. How I want it to be a YA and how it's mostly about self discovery and romance, because I can't write anything without having some type of romance in it. Though the way I see it in my head, I know I'm going to have to right it differently then my previous stories and I know that's mostly whats been holding me back from starting.

On other news I'm going to start cleaning up my pinterest. I have too many folders for things that don't need their own folders. So hopefully while I'm doing this it'll set off some type of inspiration and get me moving on my plan.

Of Love and Other Things

I'm a sucker when it comes to a good romance book. Usually I'm going up and down the isles in barnes and nobles just plucking books of the shelves and reading their backs to find out more about them. Usually I never go looking for a book in particular, unless I keep hearing about it. There are two types of love stories that I'm addicted to. The first being about two people coming together and just traveling the world and falling in love with the adventure and finally each other. There's just something so magical about it in my opinion. I love reading about these characters just finding themselves and experiencing life. I'm usually not one to read a story without some type of fantasy in it, but there are those books that sneak their way into my heart and stay there forever.

On my journey to the bookstore I picked up two books. The first was Just One Day by Gayle Forman. I found out about this book a long time ago, but never gave it any real thought. Today I just happened to see it on the bookshelf. I finished it in five hours. I could not put it down. I kept grinning like an idiot and fell completely in love with this story. The second book I got was Bloodlines by Richelle Mead. I've read her Vampire Academy series and fell completely in love with Rose. When I found out she had started on another series in the same world, I flipped. I've known about it for a long time now, but I never really read it because I knew it wasn't the right time. Now I'm looking forward to reading it.

So, I've come up with this great plot and characters for a magical realism story. Like I have everything I could possibly need to just start writing and get a couple couple paragraphs in, but I haven't started writing. I'm so completely frustrated with myself. On one hand, I do want to write this story about magical things with this amazing world that's almost like a complete fairy tale, but then deep down I want to write something completely badass. I have this idea for this girl who's just completely sure of herself. Like the kind of girl who walks like she owns the world underneath her feet and she knows it.

Part of my wants this beautiful and magical world while this other part of me wants the darkness and violence and drama. (I always say that I'm a Hufflepuff on the outside, but a complete Slytherin on the inside) I'm not sure what I'm going to do at this point at all, but I know I have to do something.

While I was also getting myself lost in the bookstore, all I kept thinking about was why I wasn't working in one? I want to be a Librarian, it would only make sense to start somewhere. It's what I want to go back to school and study. I really want to work in a bookstore and the only ones close to me are Barnes and Nobles and Books-A-Million. I like both store just fine, but they have this thing where apparently you have to know alot about the nook and getting people to buy their membership. I don't mind the nook and I wouldn't mind selling it, but why memberships? Why cant bookstores just be about books and not memberships and meeting certain numbers.